Today's Thought..Be the sand!



BE THE SAND BABY!

You ever hear that expression “Don’t bring sand to the beach”? Well I’m here to tell you that my goal is to be a damn good bag of sand and I vow to never get left behind. You guys know I hold to the mantra that good life is balanced life and I believe in his, hers, and ours. I’m just saying when it comes to “HIS/HER TIME” you should make it very hard for your partner to want to leave you behind.

Now I’m not speaking of being a pain in the ass nag, but more so being a person that your partner generally enjoys being with outside of the four walls of the house. Learn how to let your hair down and let loose with the one you love. Sometimes we get so caught up in a role of “wife” or “husband” that we forget to be a friend and companion. Do something unexpected the next time your significant offers to take you out on the town. If the venue calls for an evening gown you wear the hell out of that gown and go to Macy’s and get that smoky eye professionally done. If titties are called for then pull out those girls and spritz ‘em with some fragrance other than Jean Nate. Pull out the shoulders or a deep plunging back with that cute pair of jeans. These are the times when being extra can’t hurt.

All I’m saying is stay in the mindset of being beautiful, fabulous sand and you won’t have to worry about bitches, you’ll let bitches worry about you. Wouldn’t you rather put your toes in the pretty finely grained sand, rather than that hard crunchy shit at Lighthouse Beach? Believe me! Your man, unless he’s just a pig, will think twice about putting someone in your place no matter where he goes.

Just think about it.

 

Thanks for reading!

LOVE THYSELF VALENTINE!

 

HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY

               LOVE THYSELF!

 

 

The Valentine’s Day hoopla turns some of us into hopeless romantics, while others stew in their self-made single life misery. The most important mantra you can adapt is love thyself first and know that being single is not the worst thing you could be in life. Who better to appreciate the love you give and are capable of than YOU? So if you don’t find yourself as half of a “couple” this Valentine’s Day, make absolutely sure you take this time to do something to pamper yourself.

 

I recently gave a woman advice that I should apply to my own life, and is actually        something for everyone to try for a little mental clarity. I suggested that at least once per month she engage in a simple affordable activity that would be specific to one of her needs and that only she could enjoy selfishly. For example, a simple hair wash and condition at a salon, a basic manicure, a mall chair massage, or even a new pair of underwear. The pampering of oneself should not be a practice that puts you in debt. If you notice all the things I’ve suggested are not expensive, but more specifically don’t allow you to feel the guilt of having to share with anyone. There’s nothing wrong with a little Me-Love and Self-Preservation. If you get right within yourself maybe it will put you in a better head space to attract a romantic interest if that’s what you desire. And if not OH WELL! You’ll feel great about yourself and begin to know what makes you tick. LOVE THYSELF FIRST!

Thanks for Reading!

 

The Marriage Myth...Oh Jackie O!

 

 

JACKIE O’S MYTH: First time for love, Second time for money, Third time for companionship.

MISS SCARLET’S TRUTH: First time for infatuation & convenience, Second time for love & affection, Third time for money & companionship.

With Valentine’s Day fast approaching I figured I’d give you the Miss Scarlet take on those first, second, and third tries at marriage. I know lots of you are heading to Jared or Kay Jewelers, or whatever the trendy jewelry chain is that’s popping up on television, in the hopes of making that purchase to seal the deal on your love and I truly hope it works out for you. You could be a twenty-something that’s fallen head over heels in love, or a thirty-something that adopted celibacy while waiting for The One, or you could be like me forty, divorced with kids from the previous attempt trying to salvage your ideal that true love does exist. The latter is what brings about this Pre-Valentine Myth Buster.

DISCLAIMER: This is my blog so I can write what I wanna and if fabulous Jackie O can have an opinion I can too dammit. And hey if you’re still happily married to your high school sweetheart then please by all means share the secret with the rest of us but for now this is my shit!

First Marriage: It’s just my opinion that you probably entered into this for some measure of convenience or infatuation because you’re usually young and dumb and have been bamboozled by someone who wants something from you for the moment. Whether it’s to make your family happy or you’re smitten with sex it just went to crap! Most likely you got married before you even knew your own self and what you needed to compliment your personality and lifestyle goals. Suck it up because this isn’t the end of your life and you can still find happiness

Why did you do it…..INFATUATION & CONVENIENCE: Pregnancy. Fear of parents. For His/Her military benefits. Pure childish rebellion. (Don’t act like you don’t know what I’m saying.)

Second Marriage: This is the one you enter after you’ve discovered how crazy you are and have honed it in, but found someone who accepts you for the person you’ve grown into. This is also the person who will probably get the best from you because you refuse to either accept or give foolishness after dealing with your crazy ex-spouse. (Whew!) However, it too has the opportunity for failure because you probably put a bit too much expectation on your partner. Just remember you made a clear and conscious decision for this marriage so work toward the happily ever after.

Why did you do it….LOVE & AFFECTION: You grew tired of the empty dating scene. You finally regained trust in the opposite sex. You craved someone on the other side of the bed. (Be patient you’ll find him/her and get there sooner or later.)

Third Marriage: I think this is the one you enter into with the most apprehension because you truly believed that second one was going to be the one you died in partnership, but for some reason it shit the bed. So now here you are third time’s the charm and you vow to make it so because you just don’t want to be alone in the house. You also need someone to help you get out of the bathtub. I do think this set-up works for those who want it because it’s more of an arrangement to take care of each other and in my opinion there’s nothing wrong with this picture. Ideally both partners have their own bedrooms so you should get along pretty well. (Just make sure you get along well enough to truly care for one another.)

Why did you do it….MONEY & COMPANIONSHIP: You need medical benefits. You’re afraid of the noises the house makes. Shared living expenses work. (Yep! You’re in a situation but it can yield a very favorable outcome until one of you pushes up the daises.)

So, let’s wrap it up. My point is this, the first marriage your ring probably came from Zales (in a very rare occurrence it came from a family heirloom). Second marriage ring came from the diamond district where a stone was selected and a ring designed around it just for the bride. Third marriage rings were picked out by both partners and they probably split the cost.

It’s just about the mindset of folks who have tried, and maybe tried again to find their soul mate. Keep searching and if you can’t see the point here you’ve either never been married then divorced, or you’re still waiting for Prince/Princess Charming. I’m not going to kill your dream and tell you to stop waiting, but promise you’ll come back and read this when the hunt begins for your second spouse.

Smooches and thanks for reading!