Ladies,
I feel compelled to give you this piece of knowledge. When you meet a new guy who you really like and you're getting to know each other and he tells you about his past relationships and you're all like "Awww he's opening up to me", please just stop and listen. DO NOT! I repeat DO NOT tell him shit about anything you've done with another man. I don't care if it was ten years ago! Men cannot handle hearing about your whorish past no matter how many chicks you know they've slept with over the years.
Sadly that double standard will always exist. Even in this new age of girl power and all that crap, don't be fooled! We are ladies and the men we want to keep around still think this way and need to feel as if they're traipsing on some type of uncharted territory when it comes to our vaginas.
This is not about deceit. This is about preservation of private information about your questionable behavior and simply maintaining your favorable reputation in his manly mind. In spite of the bullshit you've done with other men, your goal in a new relationship is to allow your current state of mind and actions dictate his perception of you as a woman.
It's my job to help you so here are ten examples of things you bet-not-tell particularly in the "getting to know you" phase, and at least until you've got him in some binding contract where he can't just run away....actually maybe take these to your grave.
1. That you dated a married man. I don't care if the man you dealt with got married after you were in too deep. Don't tell him!
2. That you had abortions. Yep I went there. So many men live in a house of glass its unbelievable.
3. That you slept with any of your guy friends who you still hang out with sometimes. OH NO BITCH! Most men don't believe in platonic male-female relationships because they have a female friend they want to screw.
4. That you ever questioned your children's fathers paternity. In spite of the number of men who have unprotected sex with women some how they are still shocked and in awe that these women can actually get pregnant!
5. That you ever had a threesome. I'm sorry but you can't talk about this at the onset of your relationship! It's either going to make him think you're a whore if you were with two guys, or think he can see other women and/or possibly introduce them into your bedroom if you were with a guy and a girl.
6. That you ever hacked an exes bank account. Nope don't tell it! He'll never trust you alone in his apartment.
7. That you ever dated/slept with a thirsty man out of convenience. We all know that sometimes there is a stale period in the life of a single woman. However, you don't need to share this with a good potential dude. This may put him in the mindset that you are just giving it up to anyone who asks. Believe me he will not understand your logic!
8. That you had a one night stand. Do I even need to explain this one? And don't even go there about you were out drinking and one thing led to another. BITCH! You'll never, ever be trusted to go to the bar.
9. That you kept a fallback man until you knew he was the one. Oh my gosh disclosing this information you want to not only lose him! You want to give him an excuse to see other bitches! Girl please, he cannot handle that even though he wasn't ready to make a commitment to you at that time. He can't handle hearing you even entertained another man. And no matter how emphatically he says he doesn't care....HE DOES!
10. Do NOT tell him his position on the rotation. No matter what! DO NOT freely tell him what it is he offers you in comparison to other men you are currently dating. It is not necessary and he really doesn't want to hear about it. In case you forgot the rules to the rotation I've posted it here so you can brush up (smdh).
http://charm4sure.blogspot.com/2013/07/the-rotation.html
Y'all better listen to what I'm saying here! Women are put together with more compassion and understanding than men, which is why we were made to play the role of mothers to children. Everyone has a past and unfortunately there are people who sit very high on the throne of judgment when it comes to our chastity and societal expectations. My point is this, not every man is clueless that women are people too, but every man desires a woman he can look upon as his queen. I'm just stating my opinion and the things I've listed above you may have experienced. They may have been steps you took to get you on the path you currently stand. Don't allow your life lessons to be construed as negative and dictate how you are treated by a potential mate. Moral to the story: Keep some shit to yourself.
Thanks for reading!
